The Black Book of Discord

Tracking my ascent out of madness, one post at a time

Tuesday, April 30, 2002

Someone I worked with wanted the Summoner Geeks video short transcribed, and hell- I was bored. Since I need it to be slightly useful, I figure I'll post it here: Graham: Galstaff, you have entered the door to the North, you are now by yourself standing in a dark room. The pungent smell of mildew emanates from the wet dungeon walls 2: WHERE ARE THE CHEETOS?!?! Graham: They're right next to you Galstaff: I cast a spell 2: Where's the mountain dew? Graham: In the fridge, DUH! Galstaff: I wanna cast a spell! 2: CAN I HAVE A MOUNTAIN DEW?!?! Graham: Yes, you can have a mountain dew just go get it Galstaff: I can cast any of these right, on the list? Graham: Yes, any of the first level ones 2: I'M GOING TO GET A SODA, ANYONE WANT ONE?!?! HEY GRAHAM I'M NOT IN THE ROOM RIGHT? Graham: What room? Galstaff: I want to cast MAGIC MISSILE 2: THE ROOM WHERE HE'S CASTING ALL THESE SPELLS FROM! Graham: He hasn't cast anything yet Galstaff: I am though if you'd listen- I'm casting MAGIC MISSILE. Graham: Why are you casting magic missile? There's nothing to attack here. Galstaff: I... I'm attacking the darkness! (LAUGHTER FROM ALL) Graham: Fine, fine... you attack the darkness. There's an elf in front of you 4: WHOA! That's me right? Graham: He's wearing a brown tunic, and he has gray hair and blue eyes 4: No I don't, I have gray eyes Graham: Let me see that sheet 4: Well it says I have... well it says I have blue but I decided I want gray eyes Graham: Whatever... Okay, you guys can talk to each other now if you want Galstaff: Hello 4: Hello Galstaff: I am Galstaff, sorcerer of light! 4: Then how come you had to cast magic missile? (LAUGHTER FROM ALL) Graham: You guys are being attacked 2: DO I SEE THAT HAPPENING?!?! Graham: No, you're outside by the Tavern 2: COOL, I GET DRUNK Graham: Sigh... there are seven ogres surrounding you Galstaff: How could they surround us? I had Mordenkainen's Magical Watchdog cast Graham: No you didn't! 2: I'M GETTING DRUNK, ARE THERE ANY GIRLS THERE? Galstaff: I totally did! You asked me if I wanted any equipment before this adventure and I said no, but I need material components for all of my spells, so I cast Mordenkaiden's Faithful Watchdog. Graham: But you never actually cast it 2: ROLL THE DICE TO SEE IF I'M GETTING DRUNK! Graham: Arghhhh... yeah, you are 2: ARE THERE ANY GIRLS THERE? Graham: Yeah... Galstaff: I did though- I completely said when you asked me... Graham: NO YOU DIDN'T. You didn't actually say that you were casting the spell so now there's Ogres okay? 2: OGRES? MAN, I'VE GOT AN OGRE-SLAYING KNIFE, IT'S GOT A +9 AGAINST OGRES! Graham: YOU'RE NOT THERE! You're getting drunk! 2: OKAY, BUT IF THERE ARE ANY GIRLS THERE I WANT TO DO THEM!

posted by Captain # 11:06 PM

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